“It can be tough to talk about. I identified as lesbian for a while, and when I realized I was not lesbian but bi, people said I couldn’t ‘go back’.”—Female second-year undergraduate, Marlboro College, Vermont
“I am surprised that I’m admitting that my feelings towards girls may be stronger than other heterosexual females’. I've talked about it with my sister, who is definitely straight, and we have different attractions. I know for sure that I like boys, but girls and maybe even people of other genders or no gender may be in my future.”—Female second-year undergraduate, University of Guelph, Ontario
“I was asexual for a long time, but now I identify as bisexual. That I am bi now does not mean that I was wrong when I identified as asexual. It's more that as people grow and experience [life], they change, and sometimes that can include your sexuality. Sometimes it’s a case of realizing what was always there, but other times it's a case of genuinely new attractions and feelings.”—Female second-year graduate student, University of New Brunswick
“I’ve had encounters with men who continue to consider themselves straight despite engaging in same-sex acts. I think if we as a society were more able to openly acknowledge this—i.e., if a man has ‘permission’ to occasionally have relations with another man and not be forever labeled ‘gay’ or ‘bi’—we would experience lower rates of homophobia.”—Male postgraduate student, Drexel University, Pennsylvania
“There’s a huge disconnect between what people view as sexual identity and what sexual identity really is. Your actions regarding sex and relationships are separate and not always exclusive to your sexual identity, in the same way that romantic interactions are not always linked to your sexual identity…There are many nuances and branches of human sexuality that are far more diverse and intricate than the general public would probably care to discover.”—Female second-year undergraduate, Vancouver Island University, British Columbia
“Sexuality can be determined at birth or self-determined. Multiple factors influence our sexual identity: biology, religion, culture, race, education, family, etc. Everyone’s narrative is different. We must accept each others’ differing stories!”—Male third-year graduate student, Northern Illinois University
“Why cannot we just accept that everyone is different and that's what makes the human so unique and amazing? It may not be terrorism that tears this nation apart, it may be discrimination. I am a proud Christian who loves the many gay and lesbian friends that I have. I honesty am so blessed to have them in my life, and I will love all of them, like all other humans, till the day I die.”—Female third-year student, Wake Technical Community College, North Carolina
“Although many in the last 30–40 years have rejected traditional viewpoints on sexuality, they have been the predominant ideology in so many cultures throughout history that I feel their defenders ought to have a voice. After all, out of discussion is borne light, and that usually requires one to have prominent opinions represented in lieu of being ignored as outmoded.”—Male fifth-year undergraduate, University of the Pacific, California
“I personally do not agree with any form of sexuality other than heterosexuality or a lack of sexuality. Still, this ought to be a private thing. I would like to keep things professional with my peers who identify as what I don’t accept. But that's just me. I don't expect them to change because of me. They deserve as much respect as I do.”—Male third-year undergraduate, Towson University, Maryland
“I think that sexual identity is largely biologically determined but that there is also an environmental influence. I grew up in an environment where any sexual identity outside of heterosexual was considered wrong and illegitimate. I knew at that point that I was queer, but it was only after I was in a more open and accepting environment that I was able to come to peace with my sexuality and become more assured of it.”—Female third-year graduate student, Emory University, Georgia
“The biggest way I have seen sexual identity be affected by the environment is negatively. I’ve known several people (including myself) who have changed their sexual identity (or tried to) in order to be accepted.”—Female third-year undergraduate, California State University, San Bernardino
“I think labels of any kind can be dangerous in that they become our identity. Just because someone is gay, straight, bisexual or whatever they choose does not define them. It is only one small aspect of what makes them unique.”—Female fourth-year undergraduate, Mount Royal University, Alberta
“While it does not define my entirety, it has affected my entire life and worldview. Growing up in a somewhat conservative community and schools, I was treated differently. The verbal harassment and special treatment existed from first grade onward. It has defined my personality, worldview, religious beliefs, ability to trust people, everything. Straight people may not understand this because they were never treated like less for being straight, but that does not mean that their sexuality hasn't defined every part of their own lives, because it has. By their not being treated as I was, their own world views are different.”—Male fourth-year undergraduate, Santa Clara University, California
“Sexual identity is an important and meaningful aspect of a person’s identity, and for that reason should not be controlled by anyone other than the person.”—Male fourth-year undergraduate, Rollins College, Florida
“I am glad that sexuality is being explored more and various groups are finding inclusion, but I wish our society would stop focusing on labels so much and start focusing on what makes each individual special and unique. Let’s celebrate those qualities instead of the labels.”—Female second-year student, College of the Desert, California
“Asexuality is often ignored in the spectrum of sexual identity, marginalizing those who feel little or no sexual attraction to other people. The effect this has [is to make us] feel like there is something wrong with us, or tell ourselves that we feel an attraction we do not feel because society tells us we should.”—First-year graduate student, gender withheld, University of Maryland
“I am in love with a man and am occasionally attracted to girls … We should enjoy ourselves and be safe and kind to our partners more than we worry about labeling experiences or ourselves. Take each relationship as it comes, and be honest and ethical and compassionate and respectful to yourself and those you date. Your identity will take care of itself.”—Female graduate student, college withheld
“I feel as if putting labels on things distracts from the truth that we're all human beings who are capable of loving other human beings, whatever their labels.”—Male third-year undergraduate, University of Maryland, Baltimore County
“I feel as if putting labels on things distracts from the truth that we're all human beings who are capable of loving other human beings, whatever their labels.”—Male third-year undergraduate, University of Maryland, Baltimore County